FORGOT TO TAKE MY PILLS!

"Feeling like the lights are on but no one's in, like I'm being punished for committing a sin, silence, nothing doing, brain not working, I'm not shirking, my brain really is not working, it's like my on/off switch is in the off position, I haven't got the mental wherewithal to make a decision, I just cannot think, can't do anything, I've lost ...

WHAT’S THE POINT?

https://www.facebook.com/james.gould.754/videos/10160051134860828/ IMPORTANT, re the following poem, it does NOT reflect how I feel NOW! PLEASE DO NOT BE CONCERNED! I nearly didn't post it, so sensitive is the subject of suicide, and I know that it'll concern a lot of people but, please, do take note of the positive attitude in the second half of the poem. I ...

MY STORY: LIGHT, NOT DARKNESS

https://www.facebook.com/james.gould.754/videos/10160037490145828/ ‘A tweeter, Lauren Kay (@laurenikay) asked us to say, to tell her, what inspired us to tell our stories: I write my story, sometimes dark, but oft times, one of glory, to help people who suffer, who might be having a rougher time than me, - and I have been through tough times: I write about them in my rhymes. Mental illness is my story, depression, regression, darkness – ...

SOME MORNINGS…

'Wake up in the morning, sun outside,but inside, it’s pouring,not fully awake, mentally still snoring,pain,nothing to gain from getting out of bed,legs of lead,weighed down,it’s written in the frown on my face,anxious about re-joining the human race. Can’t see,nothing’s clear,everything distant,nothing, except the darkness, is near,my speaking, monotone,feeling lonely, alone. It’s just one of those days,the sun’s ...

‘OUTRUNNING THE DEMONS – lives transformed through running’, by PHIL HEWITT: A ‘MUST-READ’ BOOK!

Phil Hewitt’s book, ‘OUTRUNNING THE DEMONS: lives transformed through running’, I have never connected with a book quite like I have done with this one, never has a book so resonated with me, never have I been so energised in the reading of a book, never has “I just couldn’t put the book down” so ...

WHY I’M EXCITED ABOUT NEXT WEEK’S ULTRAMARATHON DESPITE THE FACT THAT I KNOW IT’S GOING TO HURT…

NEXT WEEK, at 12.01am on 16 June 2020, I'll start, with my son, my/our first ultra-marathon. On that day, I turn 54 years old. We're running 54km (33.75 miles) up and down 730m-long Herzl Street, Ra'anana. It's part of a training programme geared towards a 100-mile (160km) run, all on Herzl Street (222 times up ...

‘MONSTER-MARATHON MENTAL MILLION CHALLENGE’

‘MONSTER-MARATHON MENTAL MILLION CHALLENGE’  As many of you will know (publicity-shy I am not and, in this matter, it’s just as well!), Ziv and I have set ourselves a challenge: NAME OF CHALLENGE: ‘MONSTER-MARATHON MENTAL MILLION CHALLENGE’  WHAT IS THE CHALLENGE? THE “HERZL HUNDRED”: To run 100 miles (160km) on Herzl Street, Ra’anana* (less than half a mile long) in under ...

OUR CHILDREN’S MENTAL HEALTH IS BEING IGNORED! SITUATION: CRITICAL!

It’s 8am, I walk downstairs, I see my daughter sitting, motionless, silent, expressionless…. She’s got a bagrut exam this morning (she’s 18, the bagrut is the Israeli equivalent of an English A-Level): “What the exam today?” She thinks for a second, translates the Hebrew into English for me: “Jewish philosophy”, she mumbles, her face still expressionless.  “Jewish philosophy”, I ...

34C/94F THIS MORNING: WHAT DROVE ME TO RUN IN THIS HEAT? WHAT DID I GET OUT OF THE RUN?

It was a hard run this morning, much harder than it should have been! It wasn't a long run, only 10km, but it was hot! My alarm was set for 5.10am. I should have been out the door by 5.30am, on the street for the run. Unusual for me but I slept through the alarm.  Showered and dressed ...

AM I SUFFERING FROM AN EATING DISORDER?

Perhaps a little obsessive on the calorie counting, protein counting front. Everything I do during the day, working, resting, playing, it’s all under an umbrella of calorie counting, it’s all part of my 24/7 food, eating, nutrition and running mindset.  Everything outside of food, eating, nutrition, running is subservient, in terms of importance and priority, to ...

A ‘MUST READ’ BOOK! “JOG ON: How Running Saved My Life”, by BELLA MACKIE.

I’ve been reading a lot of books which resonate with me these days: Bella Mackie’s terrific, inspiring "JOG ON – How Running Saved My Life” is one of them. In fact, Bella’s book, her story, mirrors my story in many ways. I so ‘get’ Bella, I can see so much of myself in her struggles ...

A NEW EXPERIENCE TODAY – A SENSE OF EUPHORIA WHILST I WAS RUNNING…

Half marathon training, my plan was to run 16k/10 miles today, I did it but pushed on, to the half marathon distance, 21.1k (which was my max to date - before this morning), carried on...at 22k, a new experience, euphoria, a 'high', whilst running...23k...24k, I decided to make it 26k...I was running on autopilot, adrenalin...I ...